


Highs and Lows

by CharlieBradbury_QueenofMoondoor



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe- No Supernatural, Amusement Parks, Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety Disorder, Castiel and Dean Winchester First Meet, Castiel is a Novak, Charlie Bradbury & Dean Winchester Friendship, Charlie Ships It, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Harvelle's Roadhouse, Height Differences, M/M, Meet-Cute, Minor Jessica Moore/Sam Winchester, Past Jo Harvelle/Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-31
Updated: 2015-08-06
Packaged: 2018-04-12 07:23:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4470407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CharlieBradbury_QueenofMoondoor/pseuds/CharlieBradbury_QueenofMoondoor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After an accident in the library, Castiel Novak and Dean Winchester fall head over heels for each other. Can they make it work with their broken backgrounds? This fic will be pretty long, and each chapter will be around 3,000 words. Chapters switch main characters (Chapter one is Cas-centered, two is Dean-centered, etc.) Italics mean thoughts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. High

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic...thanks for reading!

Castiel Novak stood on his tiptoes as he reached for the library’s beat-up copy of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone.

“Why are these bookshelves so high?” he muttered under his breath. Surely other fantasy novel fans were less than six feet tall.

He looked around for a step stool or a chair he could use to increase his height. It certainly wasn’t the first time he’d have to do such a thing. Being 5’3 was difficult as a twenty-something-old man. Castiel spotted a stack of books at the end of the aisle.

_Maybe I could climb it.  I could drag them over here and use it as a step._

He went over to the stack and pushed them back to where the book was located. Castiel slowly stood on the stack, and tried to balance himself. He tried to reach for the book again, but was still six inches too short.

 _Just a little more…_ He went on his tiptoes again. _Just a few more inches…_

Just as he touched the spine of the book he was reaching for the stack fell out from beneath him. Castiel fell backwards onto his back, taking out about seven shelves with him.

 _Oops._ He sat up a bit. _Arms, legs. Nothing broken._

“Need some help?” a voice said to his right. Castiel turned his head and saw a rather tall and muscular man standing there.

“Here, let me help you up.” The man extended his hand, and Castiel gripped it as he stood.

Now that he could see the man from a better angle, Castiel saw that he was at least six feet tall. He was wearing a gray Led Zeppelin shirt with a red plaid shirt over it. He had light brown hair, almost blonde, and a very sculpted face.

“I’m Dean, by the way. And you are…?”

Castiel blinked a few times, still staring at Dean’s each and every feature. “Oh! Uh, Castiel. Castiel Novak.” He cursed his awkwardness.

“Castiel. I like it. Can I call you Cas?” Dean asked.

Castiel had never been called Cas, or any nickname. He didn’t know why, but he loved the way it sounded coming from Dean.

“Uh, sure. If you wa-“

A red-haired girl came around the corner. She was wearing a blue Star Wars shirt with green pants. Castiel noticed that she had a nametag that said ‘Charlie’.

“What the frak happened over here?” She looked at the books scattered all over the floor. It looked like a tornado had been through the fantasy section, knocking down shelves with Sanders through Wilson.

“Um, I fell.” Castiel said, embarrassed.

“I can see that. Do you think you could help me get these shelves back into place, Dean?” she turned towards him.

“Sure thing, Charlie. Oh, by the way, this is Cas.” Dean responded, gesturing towards him. Castiel wondered if they were siblings, the way they were so comfortable with each other.

“Hello, Charlie. I’m sorry about all this.” Castiel introduced himself, still embarrassed about causing such a mess.

“Well, this is nothing compared to working in the children’s section during story time. It ends up looking like post-Time War Gallifrey.” She laughed at her own reference.

Castiel smiled at her. “I’ll start alphabetizing these. Allons-y.” He knelt to the ground. Charlie grinned.

“I’ll grab a cart.” She said, heading back to the front desk.

Castiel worked in silence for a minute.

“What were you reaching for earlier?” Dean asked, pushing the metal shelf back into its slot.

“Harry Potter. I know it’s childish, but I-“

Charlie returned.

“I love Harry Potter!” she said, pushing the cart up to them. “And Dean won’t admit it but he loves it too.” She said, grinning at him.

“Sure I’ll admit it, if Cas here likes it.” He responded, snapping the last shelf into place.

Castiel blushed. Was Dean hitting on him? Or was he trying to be friendly? He couldn’t tell.

_He wouldn’t hit on someone like me. How would he even know I’m gay? Maybe he doesn’t, and he’s just seeing how I respond. I don’t think he’s gay._

“You’ll admit anything for someone you think is hot, Dean. Don’t deny it.” She said.

 _Does he think I’m hot? Maybe she’s just picking on him. She said ‘someone’ not a specified gender. Is he gay or not?!_ Castiel tried to will Charlie with his mind to giving it away.

“Hey, you’d do the same if a hot chick came strolling through here!” Dean kneeled next to Castiel and began alphabetizing.

_Chick. Okay, Charlie’s a lesbian. Also, Dean didn’t deny hitting on me. Maybe he is?_

“Not if you took her from me first!” Charlie responded as she started stacking books on the cart.

_Dang it. So he is straight. But what about everything before?_

“You’re just jealous I have twice the options that you have.” Dean laughed as he put a book cover back into place.

_Twice as many? He’s bi! This explains everything._

“What about you, Cas? What team do you play for?” Charlie asked.

“Me? I’m…I’m gay.” Castiel was nervous, but he didn’t know why. Neither Charlie nor Dean was straight, so it’s not like they were homophobic. Years of living with an anti-gay family conditioned him to keep quiet about his sexuality.

“Sweet. Maybe I do have a chance.” Dean smiled.

Castiel blushed again. He noticed that the cart was almost full, and Charlie began moving them from the cart to the shelves. He wondered why she had gotten a cart, but he realized how easy moving books was when they were all stacked and pre-organized.

About fifteen minutes later, they were down to last few books.

“Thanks, Dean. Nice meeting you, Cas!” Charlie rolled the cart back to the circulation desk.

Dean turned to Castiel. “How about I help you get it this time?” Dean barely had to life his arm up to retrieve the book. He placed it in Castiel’s hands, while staring into his deep blue eyes. “Do you want to go out sometime? For coffee, maybe?” Dean asked, not taking his eyes off of Castiel.

“I would enjoy that very much, Dean.” Dean grabbed a pen from a nearby desk. He took Castiel’s hand and began writing on it. “There’s my number. I’ll meet you at the Coffee Shack at ten tomorrow. Is that alright with you?” Dean asked.

“That’s alright with me.” He said back.

Dean turned to leave.

Castiel couldn’t believe it. He, Castiel Novak (also known as Cas), had just been asked on a date.

* * *

 

Cas entered the Coffee Shack, palms sweaty.

 _Where is he?_ Cas looked around for Dean.

"Hey, Cas! Over here!" Cas turned to his right, where Dean was sitting at a table for two.

Cas made his way to the table and took the empty seat.

"Hello, Dean. How are you today?" Cas looked to see what Dean was wearing this time. A dark green V-neck with jeans. Cas thought it looked rather good on him, not that he would say that.

“Good. You?” Dean answer-asked.

“Fine. What are you drinking?” Cas tried small talk.

“Just black. What are you going to get?” Dean smiled.

“I’m not sure. Maybe a tea of some kind.” They both sat there for a minute when Dean spoke up.

“Cas, do you even like coffee? Or tea? I don’t really. I just assumed coffee was the default first date.”

“No, not really. Want to ditch this and go get burgers?” Cas responded.

“That sounds a lot better. C’mon, I know a place.” Dean stood up, threw out his coffee, and started to walk to his car.

“Dean, I don’t know where this place is.” Cas stood awkwardly on the sidewalk.

“Oh. You can ride with me then.” Dean said as he opened his passenger door. “Here.”

Cas got into the car and closed the door, and Dean turned onto 5th Street.

“Like her? She’s a ’67 Chevy Impala. She was my dad’s until…until he died.” Dean seemed extremely excited about telling Castiel about his car, until he mentioned his father.

“I’m sorry for your loss,” Cas said. “I lost one of my brothers, and the others are in jail or missing.”

“Don’t be sorry. My dad was a drunk; I couldn’t wait to get away from him. My mom died when I was four in a house fire, so I took care of my brother myself.”

“That’s awful. My dad abandoned us for his writing career. Michael had to take care of us. He was my oldest brother, and he was a control freak. He and Nick never got along. That’s what sent them to jail. A fight happened, some guns went off, and they killed Raphael, my third oldest brother. Raphael was verbally abusive. Mostly to me, but Gabriel too. Gabriel is closest in age to me. He’s rather mischievous and deceptive. After Raphael died, he abandoned me and took off. I’ve only seen him once since.”

_Why am I telling this stranger my life story?_

Cas had never had someone close enough to tell this all too, and he hoped he and Dean would become closer.

“Cas?"

“Yeah?”

“We’re here.”

Cas looked outside at the restaurant. “Harvelle’s Roadhouse?” he asked.

“Yeah. Owned by some of my friends. Bobby introduced us. Wait, I haven’t told you about Bobby, have I? I’ll tell you when we get inside.” Dean said, holding the door for Cas.

The inside of the restaurant was more of a bar than a restaurant. There were bar stools, TVs with the latest football game, and a pool table in the corner. If there hadn’t been a menu on the wall, Cas wouldn’t have known they even served food.

“Hey, Dean!” a woman’s voice could be heard over the buzz of the customers.

“What’s up, Ellen?” Dean yelled back.

The woman walked over and gave Dean a hug, then grabbed him a menu and some silverware.

“Oh, just the usual. How about you? Who’s this?” Ellen smiled at Cas.

“I’m…Cas. Cas Novak.” Cas decided that from now on, he was Cas.

“Well, welcome to the Roadhouse, Cas. Let me get you guys a table.” Ellen smiled again and led them to a table for two. She handed them menus, but Dean handed them back.

“My regular, for both of us. I want him to experience what Harvelle’s does best.” He said.

“Alright. So that’s two double cheeseburgers with waffle fries, and a couple of beers?” She looked to Cas to see if that was alright with him.

“Um, can you replace the beer with a water for me? I don’t drink.” Cas looked at the ground. He didn’t want to seem like a wimp for not liking alcohol.

“Of course! Coming right up.” Ellen replied. She left and walked back to the kitchen.

“So Cas, tell me more about yourself.” Dean looked genuinely interested in Cas. Cas had never had someone look at him the way Dean was looking at him.

“I just told you my life story, Dean. Tell me more about you.” Cas responded.

“Okay. I like classic rock. I have a little brother, Sammy. He’s smart. I’m not. I was never good in school. I’m a mechanic-Well, I was. I got laid off last week, now I’m looking for a job and some cheap housing. I picked up a few shifts at the library, but that’s temporary.”

 _That  was_ _a lot. I’ll start with the brother._

“Sammy? Is that your brother you had to take care of?”

“Yeah. He went to Stanford as soon as he graduated, but my dad didn’t approve. It hurt when he left. But I knew it would be better for him there, away from my dad. He has a fiancée now, Jessica. I’m happy for him.” Dean claimed to be happy, but looked a bit sad at his brother’s freedom.

“That sounds nice. What’s he majoring in?” Cas asked politely. “Law. Like I said, he’s smart.” Dean looked so proud of him, as if it was his own child.

_Dean doesn’t think much of himself._

“I’m sure you’re smart too, Dean. What about your mechanic job? How’d you like that?”

“I got sort of pulled into it. A friend of mine, Garth, offered me the job after Dad’s death. It felt like a pity job, but I needed the money. I knew a lot about cars from Bobby.” Dean smiled as he said the name.

“You still haven’t told me about Bobby.” Cas was interested in Dean’s friends and family.

A blonde girl showed up and placed their drinks in front of them.

“What’s happening, Jo?” Dean asked the girl.

“Nothing much. I would stay and talk, but I have tables to wait. See you later!” Jo ran over to the next table and handed the family sitting there some straws.

“That's Jo, Charlie's ex. Mine too, but you don't know that. Anyway, Bobby. Bobby was a friend of my dad’s, and he took care of us while my dad was out getting drunk and gambling his life away. He has a ton of cars on his lot, and bunches of other mechanics call him with questions or references. It’s kind of funny, really.”

“That must have sucked, losing your job like that.” Cas tried to stretch the conversation for as far as he could without talking about himself.

“Yeah. Garth’s supervisor decided to let all the ‘little guys’ go. Charlie hooked me up with a few shifts a week at the library, but shelving books isn’t really my thing.” Dean looked a little angry about losing his job, so Cas tried to shift the subject again.

“Charlie was the girl I met yesterday, right? The redhead?” Cas asked, even though he already knew the answer.

“Yeah. She and I go back pretty far. I fixed up her car, and in exchange she fixed up my laptop. She’s a coding and IT expert.” Dean said.

Ellen came back to the table with a tray.

“Here you go, boys. Eat up!” She took the tray back and walked away.

Cas took a bite into his burger.

 _Wow. Dean wasn’t kidding when he said Harvelle’s was good at burgers_.

Dean looked at Cas. “Now that the food’s here, you should tell me a bit more about you. Tell me a bit more about your family. The good stuff.”

“Uh, okay. Michael used to make really good soup. Nick was good at making people laugh. Raphael…he would fight off bullies at school. Gabriel always had candy on him, and he pulled lots of pranks. And Dad used to tell us great stories before he left.” Cas struggled to find good things in Michael, Nick, and Raphael. He was extremely close to Gabriel, and the only thing that made Cas think less of him was the fact that he walked out.

“What’d you do after the big fight?” Dean asked carefully, hoping he wouldn’t upset Cas.

“I was sixteen. I found a homeless shelter, and had a job at convenience store. I got a few raises, so when I was eighteen I found a cheap apartment that I could barely afford and lived paycheck to paycheck. I did that for about three years. Now I’m a store manager at a department store.” Cas had also never told anyone about his homelessness.

“Dude, your life sounds like a soap opera.” Dean said.

“So does yours.” Cas returned. The two ate in silence for the next few minutes.

“Dean, I have realized something. I do not know your last name.” Cas said suddenly.

Dean laughed. “It’s Winchester. Dean Winchester.”

_I enjoy being around Dean Winchester._

“Now, tell me just a bit more, Cas. I want to know all that I can about you.” Dean said, smirking.

“Well, I like rap music. I’m a Christian. I love reading. My favorite color is blue. I have a cat, her name is Hannah. I named her after an old friend of mine.”

“Christian? And gay at the same time? Isn’t that against the rules?” Dean questioned.

“Well, to some people, yes. I don’t believe it is. I don’t want to get into a deep philosophical conversation right now.” Dean thought about this for a second.

“Okay then. What do you like to read?”

Cas thought about all of the books in his library. “The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis. I’ve read all of them at least three times. I also like Stephen King novels.”

“Horror books, now we’re talking. Do you like horror movies?” Dean asked.

“Sometimes. Most of the time they freak me out.” Cas replied.

“It’s my favorite genre. Monsters, demons, the works.” Dean said.

“I’m more of a sci-fi and fantasy kind of guy. Doctor Who, Star Trek, superheroes.” Cas hoped that Dean shared at least one of his interests.

“You and Charlie will get along great. She’s into all of that stuff, and she got me into it too.” Dean seemed a little embarrassed, admitting that he was a bit of a nerd.

 _He’s hot when he’s embarrassed. Actually, he’s always hot_.

“Cas? You okay?” Dean looked a bit concerned.

“Oh, uh, yeah. I’m fine.”

 _I'm just admiring your face_.

“Are you almost done eating?” Dean questioned.

Cas looked at his mostly finished burger. “Yeah. I like this place. We should come back here.” Cas felt nervous adding that last line, and wondered if it was too blunt.

“Yeah, we should. Actually, we should spend more time anywhere together. How about you meet me at Busch Gardens?” Dean smiled and hoped for a yes.

“Busch Gardens? Like, the amusement park that’s three hours away?”

Dean laughed. “Yeah, that’s the one. We can ride together, split the travel costs. C’mon, it’ll be fun.”

“Well…okay then, Dean Winchester. I’ll go with you to Busch Gardens. I probably won't ride any coasters, though. I’m free next Saturday.” Cas wasn’t a big fan of roller coasters, but he was looking forward to spending more time with Dean.

“I’ll pick you up at six. Text me your address. Now, let’s get out of here.”

Dean and Cas got up, walked to the register, and paid their bills. Dean waved goodbye to Ellen and Jo, and the pair got into the car. Dean drove Cas back to his car and dropped him off.

“See you next Saturday, Cas.” Dean drove away, and Cas watched him leave.

_See you next Saturday, Dean._


	2. High, Low

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean and Cas head to Busch Gardens for a day of fun. Less than an hour into the park, Cas has a bit of a breakdown. (Dean-centered chapter.) Content Warning: Descriptions of panic and anxiety.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the hits and kudos! I hope the writing isn't too bad... Anyway, if you haven't been to Busch Gardens or don't know what it is, it's a Europe-themed park. There are different sections that are made to look like different countries: Italy, Germany, France, Ireland, Scotland, and England. I chose it because I know it like the back of my hand. Enjoy!

Dean woke up early on Saturday morning. He was quick to get ready, and he was anxious to see Cas again. It had been almost a week since they had lunch together, and it took every ounce of self-control Dean had to not text Cas constantly. They had talked a little bit, but they hadn't seen each other at all since Harvelle's.

 

Dean pulled put his phone and entered Cas’s address into his GPS. As he drove to Cas’s house, he planned all the things he was going to say.

_Long time, no see? No, that’s cheesy, and it’s only been a week. It’s great to see you, dude! No, you can’t call someone you’re dating dude. Or can you? Well, if we’re dating. Are we? I hope so._

 

Dean pulled up to Cas’s apartment complex and located the door that said 221B. He knocked and took a step back from the door.  After a few moments Cas opened the door, grinning.

 

“Hi, Dean! I was just throwing my backpack together. Come in for a minute.” Cas opened the door a bit wider to let Dean through. “Let me go grab my keys and wallet. I’ll be right back.” Cas turned down the hallway on Dean’s right.

 

Cas’s apartment was small and immaculate. The kitchen was on the left, and the only dish out of place was Cas’s cup of tea from earlier in the morning. The living area was combined with the dining room, and the kitchen was open to this area as well. A small, black, square table with four chairs was the dining ‘room’, and was just a few feet away from the tan sectional that faced an older-style TV. The TV was sitting on two bookshelves, one with books, and one with board games.  Dean couldn’t see down the hallway from where he was standing, but he assumed Cas’s room and bathroom were down there.

 

Cas returned from his room, wallet and keys in hand. “Are we ready to go?” He asked excitedly as he threw them in his backpack, and then slung it over his shoulder.

 

Dean smiled at Cas’s enthusiasm. “Ready as I’ll ever be.” Dean turned and walked out the door. Cas followed and locked the door behind him.

 

“Where are you parked?” Cas asked, looking for the Impala. Dean pointed across the parking lot.

 

The couple headed over to the car, and Dean opened the passenger door for Cas.

 

“Have you been to Busch Gardens before, Cas?” Dean asked as put the car in gear.

 

“No. I’ve only been to an amusement park once, when I was 12. A friend took me. Her name was Meg.” Cas smiled at the name.

 

“Sammy and I used to sneak into them when we were teenagers. When you exit the park and want to come back later, they stamp your hand with that day’s date in purple ink. We would stamp the date on our hands and act like we had been there earlier. A little illegal, but it was hard to find money for fun back then. Now I buy season passes to try and make up for all the times I cheated them out.” He was a bit ashamed of sneaking into the parks, but he wanted Sam to have as normal of a childhood as he could provide.

 

“A bit illegal, yes. Michael used to sneak us into the movie theatre if that makes you feel any better.” Cas said.

 

“We did that once or twice. I worked at one for a while, so we just used that to our advantage.” Dean turned on his GPS again, but only set it to get him to the highway from Cas’s apartment. He had been the park so many times, he didn’t need directions.

 

Dean noticed that Cas stayed quiet until they reached the highway, not wanting to speak over the GPS’s monotone voice. Cas’s apartment was only thirty minutes away from the highway, so when they got there, Cas started up some more conversation.

 

“So, what should we do first? I’ve never been, and you sound like an expert. Tell me all the tips and tricks.” Cas looked at Dean, staring at him while he was distracted, driving.

 

“Well, once we get in, we should go past Sesame World, unless you’re into that, but we might look a bit odd hanging out around four-year-olds. Then we should hit up Escape from Pompeii, unless you want to stay dry, then we could come back later in the day. After that there’s Italy, and there are a few kid rides and some bigger ones. There’s a couple of coasters there too. When I come with Charlie and her girlfriend we usually do things in Germany until we get hungry, then we go back to Italy for the spaghetti bar. How does that sound?” Dean could go on forever, but wanted to hear Cas’s voice again.

 

“Well, we can definitely pass Sesame World. I’d prefer to stay dry until the end of the day, if that’s okay with you. Rides in Italy sound fun, and eating there sounds okay too. What other food options are there?” Cas asked.

 

“Hmm. There’s a smokehouse in France that’s good, Germany has a big cafeteria-style place, and there are lots of stands and stuff throughout. Whatever you’re in the mood for. After lunch we usually finish anything we didn’t get around to in Germany, and then head to France for two of the other big coasters, Alpengiest and Griffon. We look at all the animals there, the wolves, the owls, so on and so on. We try and catch a show in the evening when our feet hurt and we get all hot and sweaty, usually in Ireland. After that we go to Scotland to look at the horses and ride the Loch Ness Monster. Then we head home. Once or twice we’ve stayed at a hotel and went two days, or went to the park one day and the water park the next day. Maybe you and I could do that sometime.” Dean smiled. He hoped Cas wanted to spend as much time with him as Dean had planned.

 

“That would be fun. Today’s plan sounds good to me. How many hours away are we?” Cas asked, looking at the clock. 7:28.

 

“One hour, forty-five minutes. You can take a nap or something if you want. Kevin always did when he rode with us. Kevin was a friend of Sam and me. He was a few years younger than us, but he was in honors classes with Sam. He died in a car crash a few years ago. He was 18. I miss him.” Dean looked distant, like he wasn’t really there.

 

  _C’mon, Dean! There I go again, making things sad._

 

“I’m sorry about that. I lost Hannah in a car accident. She was driving home from church one Sunday when she got hit by a drunk driver. He got out fine, but she had severe injuries. She was pronounced dead on the scene. That’s one reason why I don’t like alcohol very much.” Cas frowned.

 

“I’m sorry about Hannah. I get why you stay away from alcohol now. I would too.” Dean wasn’t really sure what to say after that, so he stayed silent. Cas apparently didn’t either, so they sat in silence for a few minutes.

 

After getting bored of the quiet, Cas suggested that they try to find all of the letters in the alphabet using only signs and license plates.

_Kevin used to do that. When he wasn’t asleep. Or dying. Why do I think these things?_

 

Cas won the first round, and Dean won the second. After that they stopped keeping track and started trying to spell out words, and then they played 20 Questions.

 

“Okay, it’s a person.” Dean said.

 

“Is this person male?” Cas asked.

 

“Yes.”

 

“Are they attractive?”

 

“Yes,” Dean said “Very.”

 

“Okay. Are they an actor?” Cas asked.

 

“No.” Dean responded.

 

“Are they a musician?” Cas asked another question.

 

“No.” Dean smiled as he said it.

 

“Are they even famous?” Cas asked, confused.

 

“Well…not really. No.” Dean said.

 

“Do I know this person?” Cas asked.

 

“Yes.” Dean said back.

 

“Is it Charlie?” Cas asked.

 

“It’s a male, remember?” Dean hoped Cas would catch on.

 

“Oh. Okay, a not-famous attractive male that we both know. Is it you?” Cas asked, laughing a bit.

 

“No. Close.” Dean looked at Cas.

 

“Well it isn’t me. Wait, it’s not, right?” Cas’s eyes widened.

 

“Ding ding ding! We have a winner!” Dean laughed and Cas blushed.

 

“Well, thank you for calling me attractive. But the not-famous part offended me a bit. How dare you say that? I am very well-known at Macy’s.” Cas smiled Dean picked up on the sarcasm dripping from his words.

 

“I’m sorry, Mr. Macy’s manager. How can I make it up to you?” Dean asked, grinning.

 

“You can look at the road and not miss your exit.”

 

“Oh, crap!” Dean exclaimed as he pulled out in front of several cars to get to the exit. Cas chuckled as Dean turned the steering wheel to the right.

_Ugh, why wasn’t I paying attention any better?_

 

“Well…we’re here!” Dean said cheerily, pulling up to the parking booth.

 

“Hello, welcome to Busch Gardens.” A tired looking girl said. She had a British accent, and her name tag said Bela. “Normal parking or premium? Nice car, by the way.” She smiled while looking at the Impala.

 

“Thanks. Normal, please.” Dean handed her a few bills.

 

“Just pull on ahead and Frank will direct you to the correct lot. Have a nice day.” Bela motioned for them to pull ahead and waved.

 

Dean pulled ahead, and a man who he assumed to be Frank told him to turn left, and then pull into the parking lot with the purple sign. Dean did that, and chose a spot. He and Cas got out of the car and started walking to the gates.

 

“I have my pass, so I don’t need to buy a ticket. Did you buy online or are getting them today?” Dean asked Cas, hoping he had bought online. The line to get tickets was ridiculously long, and Dean wanted to get right into the park.

 

“Online. I did think that far ahead.” Cas smiled as he pulled the papers from his pocket and held them up. He opened them up and read them as he walked. He stopped in front of the bathrooms.

 

“I’m going to head to the bathroom, I’ll be right back.” Cas said.

 

“I’ll wait by the stroller rental.” Dean said, and walked over next to it.

_Oh, the classical music. Not really my thing, but I love it when I’m here._

 

Cas came back out and almost ran to Dean.

 

“Let’s go! I’m ready to start doing stuff.” Cas took Dean by the hand and started walking.

 

“Cas,” Dean said, “You’re heading the wrong way. That’s the bus parking lot.”

 

“Oh. We’ll go this way!” Cas said, letting Dean lead the way.

 

They walked a little ways to the actual entry to the park. Dean picked a line and stood there. Cas followed and stood beside him. The crowds were low that day, so they were in and out of the ticket scanning station in no time.

 

“Okay. This is the England section, Cas. There’s a tiny Big Ben, a few little stores, a café, and the ‘Globe Theatre’. They used to have a Sesame Street 4-D thing that was actually kind of cute, but now it’s a pirate thing, and it's super cool. We could catch one later if you’d like.” Dean smelled the pastries from the café and the sweet shop. He noticed Cas doing the same.

 

“Okay. Should we head to Italy now?” Cas asked, remembering the original plan.

 

“Sure. Right this way!” Dean said, leading Cas through the small crowd. On the way they saw a caricature booth, the train, and Sesame World.

 

“Look on the right, Cas. That one’s Escape from Pompeii. Inside the actual ride there’s real fire and stuff like that. It’s kind of neat, but the best part is the drop at the end.”

 

They walked around Pompeii and crossed a small bridge to Italy.

 

“That’s the Battering Ram, and that’s DaVinci’s Cradle. Sam hates that one, it makes him sick. Let’s get on the Battering Ram!” Dean said, getting into the short line. Cas smiled and followed.

 

“What row should we sit in?” Cas asked. The Battering Ram looked like a big boat, with several rows facing each other.

 

“My favorite is the one all the way to the left. The ones on the end make you parallel to the ground when they go all the way up. I always put my hands up, it makes it more fun that way.” Dean told him as the attendant opened up the rope to let them in.

 

Dean and Cas went all the way to the left, slid into the seat, and pulled the bar over their laps. The ride started up, swaying back and forth, so that they were above the people on the other side. Dean threw his hands up, but Cas held tightly onto the bar. The Battering Ram swayed for a bit longer, pushing them higher and higher each time. Eventually the ride slowed down to a stop, and the pair exited the ride.

 

“Did you like it?” Dean asked hoping that Cas had enjoyed it.

 

“Yeah, I liked it. I just didn’t like the ‘stomach in my throat’ feeling.” Cas responded.

 

“Yeah, I feel you. The next few rides up here aren’t very bad, except for the coaster.” Dean said, walked towards the other section of Italy.

 

The first ride there was the coaster, Apollo’s Chariot.

 

“Hey Cas, let’s do this!” Dean pointed to the coaster with excitement. He ran up to get in line and beckoned Cas over to him.

 

Cas looked hesitant. “I’ll just hold our stuff. I told you, I’m not a big coaster guy.”

 

Dean looked a bit disappointed. He looked to the coaster, and the, back to Cas. “C’mon, Cas. I’m here, I’ll be next to you the whole time. It’ll be fun! It doesn’t even go upside-down. I’ve been on it a million times, it’s not bad. Please?”

 

Cas looked very uncomfortable, but he also looked a little excited. “Well…I guess it won’t hurt to try. But only once, no more after this,” He said, joining Dean at the entrance. “I’ll put our things in one of the lockers over there.”

 

Dean’s face lit up as he walked with Cas to put his backpack in the locker. He noticed that Cas was breathing a bit oddly.

_Probably just a little nervous. No big deal._

 

After the couple had placed their belongings into the tiny locker, they got in line for the coaster.

 

Dean looked up at all of the ups and downs of the coaster. He watched one of the trains whiz past, all of the riders squealing in a rush of adrenaline. He watched three more of them, and each time it made him more and more excited. Even though he had been on it a million times, he always got excited in line. He turned to ask Cas what row they should sit in when he saw what Cas was doing.

 

Cas was sitting on the ground, on one of the steps of the waiting line. He was breathing in shallow, short bursts, as if he couldn’t breathe at all. His hands were on his face, and he was shaking all over, and people were beginning to stare. 

_He’s having a panic attack! Crap, it’s been forever since I’ve had to do this._

 

Dean stepped towards him, trying to remain calm. He kneeled facing Cas and took his hands, pulling them away from his face. Cas’s face was a look of pure terror, his blue eyes wide open.

 

Dean grabbed Cas’s hands firmly. “Just breathe with me, Cas. In, out. In, out. Deep breaths.” He said softly. He had obviously had to talk someone down from an anxiety attack before. He continued speaking to Cas. “This will pass. You’re doing great.”  Dean placed one of his hands on Cas’s chest, feeling his heartbeat. He did this for a few minutes, letting others in line pass them.

_Why didn’t he tell me he had issues with anxiety? I wouldn’t have made him do this._

 

Cas blinked a few times. His breathing was slowing, and he wasn’t shaking as badly. Eventually he stood up and started walking down the stairs. Dean followed, still holding his hand.

 

“I’m sorry, Dean. I didn’t mean to…freak out,” Cas pulled his hand away from Dean’s. “I forgot to take my medicine this morning. I thought I could handle it.” Cas looked embarrassed. He refused to make eye contact with Dean, staring at the ground as they walked back to the lockers.

 

“No, Cas. It’s fine. Panic attacks happen. Sam used to get them all the time, so I’m used to talking people down from them. Do you have any of your medicine with you?” Dean took Cas’s hand again and led him to the lockers. Cas removed his backpack, and Dean took his. Dean led Cas to a nearby bench.

 

Cas sat and opened his backpack. He dug through all the pockets, taking things out and shuffling them around. When he couldn’t find what he was looking for he started to look panicky again so Dean took the bag from his hands and placed all the items back into it.

 

“No. No, I don’t have any of my medicine with me. I usually do. Why aren’t they here now? What am I going to do?”

 

“It’s going to be okay, Cas. I’m here with you. Let’s go get some water.” Dean took Cas’s hand (again) and walked towards the ice cream shop.

 

“What can I get you?” The boy behind the counter asked, looking a bit oddly at the teary-eyed Cas.

 

“Two cups of water, please.” Dean said, not letting go of Cas’s hand.

 

The boy filled two paper cups and handed them to Dean, who took them with one hand. Dean walked with Cas back to the bench, let go of his hand, and gave him the cup of water. Cas took it and drank slowly, as Dean sat down next to him.

 

“On a scale of one to ten, how anxious are you, Cas?” Dean asked looking into Cas’s eyes.

 

Cas put his cup down. “Four. I was at an eight, but now it’s a four.”

 

“Okay, Cas. Let’s just chill here until it’s a one, or a zero.” Dean said, leaning back onto the bench.

 

Cas leaned back too, and slipped his hand next to Dean’s. Dean reached out and took it.

 

“You know…that’s the first time we’ve ever held hands,” Cas said, looking at their intertwined fingers. “It’s definitely bringing my anxiety levels down.”

 

Dean smiled and squeezed three times. Cas didn’t know about the meaning behind them, of course, but he squeezed back anyway. Dean smiled, because he knew exactly what the squeezes meant.

_I love you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you like the Sherlock reference? I feel like I'm making them fall way to fast but...it's my fanfic! I hope you enjoyed this chapter!

**Author's Note:**

> So! Hope you liked it. I don't know when I'll update next. The chapter's written out, it just needs heavy editing.


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